Barbecue and Sympathy

So today is, well should be a happy day as our fancy shmanzy barbecue has arrived along with some “stress relief” purchases of a ridiculously expensive cover and grill scraper. 

It’s a funny thing that when you are living through a grieving process you feel like either you can’t or shouldn’t be laughing and if you do so involuntarily, you feel guilty. But the simple fact of life is that, it does carry on. Things DO carry on being funny and people and things are able to make you laugh. 

Just because you laugh it doesn’t mean you aren’t still grieving or that your loss is diminished, it isn’t. For me, it just means that I am human. But I still feel guilty. 

But dad has been round today and we haven talked about mum and things and I think it helps us both. By all accounts, my sister is coping in her usual way, by shopping the hell out of her credit card! We all have our ways of dealing.. 

I have also had some flowers from work today, I was very touched.. and our sideboard is heaving from the sympathy cards. I always think of myself as a person with very few friends, so to receive so many cards is a real humbling experience. 

G x 

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