Oh so tired

So I thought I would write a dead honest blog tonight. I try to remain positive and happy as a rule, but we all know sometimes it harder than others. I have to say, upfront, that I am definitely not sad, but I am very very tired.

As you might have seen in previous posts, I have been seconded into another role at work, which has seen me working away on and off since mid-October. I am now VERY familiar with the Travelodge and even the not so glorious Ibis in Leicester. I have also been working super hard on the new project and my 43 year old brain is a little fried. So the combination of the train journeys, many nights in hotels and the extra work, combined with my current commute to and from Manchester (anything from 40 minutes to 2 hours) I am ready for a good old rest.

I haven’t been able to get my ducks in a row to do VLOGMAS this year and I am sort of letting my YouTube channel stagnate.  I have made arrangements to do things and see friends with genuine intentions, but after long days and things, I just can’t be bothered. Tonight was one of those nights, when I couldn’t muster the energy to go to the WI Christmas party. I REALLY wanted to go, but I just couldn’t drag my weary butt  into the shower and I am not sure greasy hair and comfy pants is really all that Christmassy. 😫 Then of course there is the feeling again this year, that Christmas without mum, is just a little bit shitter.

BUT.  I have just one week to go until M and I finish for Christmas. 7 short days until I can switch off the alarm and call “job done” for 2017. Then we have got a lovely mini-break to Harrogate before the hoopla of Christmas kicks in and even a night away in Chester in between Christmas and New Year. So 7 sleeps until I can just actually sleep past 7:30am. I can’t bloody wait!

G x

To tell or not to tell

You may have seen the YouTube video I filmed a couple of weeks ago about some of the Inappropriate friends that I have had? But I just thought I would write another post about something that happened to me a few years ago with possibly the most inappropriate friend ever!!

So when I worked for a charity in Manchester I had a “work friend” that I used to have quite a laugh with, she worked on reception and we always used to have a chat on my way to and from meetings and things. Over a period of time she had become increasingly unhappy in her marriage and had started to sail pretty close to the wind on nights out. This resulted in her sleeping with her husband’s best friend which was awful of course, but her life, her decision.

Her behaviour however, escalated and she signed up for one of these dodgy sites where people can meet each other for all manner of extra curricular activities. I advised her again it many times, but she was hellbent on doing whatever (and whoever) she fancied. But still, her life, her choice.

One day at work, as I walked past reception, she sort of grabbed me and dragged me into the toilet. I thought she was upset and was therefore dumbstruck when she locked the cubicle door and whipped off her top and bra. “Take a photo of my t*ts?” she asked. Apparently, had been chatting to one of her new “friends” and he had requested proof of boobage. Despite my shock, I took the photo, if only to get the hell out of there.

Later that day, she shouted me as I walked past her desk, to show me the new boots she had bought and more crucially was wearing. They were thigh high leather boots with cut outs in them to reveal an abundance of thigh – think Julia Roberts at the start of Pretty Woman. You also have to bear in mind that she worked ON RECEPTION in a busy organisation and training venue. I was mortified and just smiled and told her they were nice. She really wasn’t in a place mentally to even try to read the look of horror on my face.

I did try to talk to her a few times to see if I could at least get her to calm down a bit, but she was sort of on a roll and loving it. Also, at the end of one of these chats, she just turned on her work computer and showed me the penis of a complete stranger that she was coveting. 🙁 But it gets worse.

A few weeks later, as I was signing in at work when she grinned at me and said:

Her: Guess what I was doing at 6:30 this morning?

Me: What?

Her: Having sex in Room 1!

Me: WHAATTT?!?!?!

It seems that she had been chatting to bloke from the dodgy dating site (she was still very much married) and he was in Manchester for the night, so she had invited him to our office to hook up. It’s worth pointing out that at the time of this conversation, training delegates were having tea & coffee IN ROOM 1 before their training started. Gross squared.

As I really didn’t know what to do or say, I just laughed and retreated to my desk upstairs. I spent the whole day in a bit of a fog and the second I walked through the door at home, I told M everything. But now the question was to Tell or Not to Tell?

She had been unfaithful to her husband several times before and whilst I 100% disagreed with that, it was her choice. But having sex at work with a total stranger was crossing a massive line. She had put herself and potentially colleagues and even the entire building at risk by letting this man in at 6am. But should I tell? I was so torn. The next day I grabbed my friend Karen, who worked in the same building and told her everything. Being a step removed, Karen could see things more clearly than I could and offered to tell my work friend’s manager what had happened. What a pal – she actually became my best friend, even to this day.

The following day, I spent the morning at my desk and just before lunch, I was coming down the stairs to go out to a meeting when I saw the guilty work friend leaving the building in flood of tears. I froze half way down the stairs so she didn’t see me, but there was nothing for it, I had an appointment and HAD to go out. I crept towards my car, but just as I thought I was safe, through snot and tears, she shouted me over.

It seems they had sacked her because they had “found out she had left the building insecure” and that by letting the stranger in, she had put the building and it’s contents as risk. They had checked the CCTV and seen him arriving just after 6am and leaving a little before 8am and when she was asked who he was, she tried to say he was a financial advisor. Of course no-one believed her and even though there was no proof of what had happened in Room 1, it seems they already had a portfolio of other things that had slowly been going awry.

I felt so guilty for all of this and I sometimes still agonise over it today and I felt like my decision to tell made her lose her job. But people who were around at the time have reassured me that it was her own actions that caused her downfall. After all, this was the one time she told me about, but she could have done this lots of other times in secret. She put me at risk by telling me and being alone with this stranger at 6am was dangerous on so many levels. One friend even had a theory that she told me as she knew I would have to intervene and the outrageousness would have to stop. Not sure about that, but you never know.

I never saw the work friend again after that fateful day, well except for just once a few weeks later. I was walking from the station to work about 8:15am and I spotted her walking towards me. She tried to tell me she was going to her new job, but I don’t know many company dress codes that include sunglasses, a backless silver top, a beret and 4″ stilettos.

G x



Sleep injuries?

There are many things people like to tell each other about reaching 40, people share stories left, right and centre about the joys of middle age – whatever that is. But one thing no-one told me about, was that in my 40s, I would get injured in bed. Now before your mind descends into the gutter, it’s really nothing like that!

I have noticed over the last few months that I am waking up in a morning with a sore shoulder or stiff hips and I feel like I should have to do a full on stretching circuit before I can begin my day!


I don’t really bother about my age most days, it really is just a number my clicky joints sometime protest too much. So do I attack the cod liver oil? Do I get a special mattress or do I just put on my big girl pants and stop moaning. Yes, let’s do that!

G x


94 days till Christmas

Too soon? OK yes, maybe it’s too soon to be talking about Christmas, but today is the Autumn Equinox, which google reliably informs me that today marks the day when the days and nights are the same length and from now on, the nights will get longer. Google also tells me that this isn’t really celebrated that much… can’t think why?!

I have also had confirmation today that when my new job starts in October, I will be spending most weekdays for the first month in London. This is a big deal for me and it’s as exciting as it’s daunting, but it does feel like and adventure. I have to admit, that I am going to miss my amazing M and it’s going to be odd having an adventure without him. But life and career moves forward and I am just going to have to put my big girl pants on and go with it.

So I will definitely update my blog and I might even VLOG a little to document my time in that there London,  I really just hope they can cope with my lovely Haydock accent!!