Lockdown Thoughts |Coronavirus

Lockdown Thoughts |Coronavirus

Well that is week 1 of official Lockdown started. How has it been going for you? For me, well I am just shattered. Even though I am moving less physically, I am mentally drained as it’s SO much more to think about than normal.

I deliver a lot of training in my day job and so that has all been cancelled. I am lucky enough to have a full-time job that isn’t affected by this whole thing (yet) But I have been working mega hard training people via Google Meet to work remotely, which has seen me deliver 9 training sessions in a week to staff from all across the UK.

At home, things have changed too as I have been joined by M in my home office as after Boris made his announcement, he has been working from home too. It has to be said that whilst the situation we are in is scary and difficult, having the 3 of us together at home, is just brilliant..

One odd thing though for me is the way I have reacted to the whole thing. I am normally one of those people who will put myself forward to help, will volunteer and get involved, but during this time, I just haven’t been able to. The reason for me is an odd one. I feel super anxious at the moment, which isn’t like me. Is it my hormones? Maybe. Is it the virus… well yes… but it’s not just that. I have talked about losing my mum a lot on this blog as it was a horrible pivotal moment in my life. She was very ill in the year between her diagnosis and death and I spent that entire year with a ball of worry and unease in my stomach that disrupted my sleep, eating habits and made me wake up every morning knowing something was wrong. Sadly, that’s how I feel now.

Somehow this virus thing has been quite triggering for me as it reminds me about the last time I was intensely worried about illness. I’ve tried to shake it, but I can’t. I feel better now the three of us are safely at home and the unease is a tad better, but it’s still there.

As I write, my brother-in-law came home from work last night with symptoms and has been told to self-isolate. Even though he will probably be ok (normally fit and well), his daughter (our niece) is a T1 Diabetic and is in the vulnerable category…. it’s just too much to think/worry about.

But I have to say that the country and my community, in particular, has really pulled together to help each other. The NHS clap in the week saw friends and neighbours stood at their doors clapping to support the NHS for looking after us. More than a few of my neighbours are police officers and wow, it must be so stressful to keep going out to work every day, but especially now, I am so grateful.

But one very good thing is that M and I have been cooking loads and being loads better at not wasting food. Something fresh to eat every night with hardly a takeaway in sight. I will take that silver lining.

Hope you are ok. Stay Safe. Stay at Home. Wash Your Hands.

G x

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